I think I am suffering from Corona-Confusion!

I think I am suffering from CC

Yep! It’s a thing! I am currently suffering from a bad case of CC. That’s right, “Corona Confusion” and my affliction seems to be intensifying on the daily. The ground-rules keep a-changing and I, for one, am having a hard time keeping up. 

To the powers that be!

I mean, I am over 50 ‘Sco-Mo’ (Australian Prime Minister for those who don’t know – we abbreviate everything down-under) and going through ‘The Pause’.  So I tend to forget why I entered a room most of the time, let alone being able to follow and keep up with the crazy rules that differ from State to State and change from hour to hour for Pete’s sake. 

I get it, we’re in the middle of a pandemic, so it’s good to protect yourself, stay inside unless it’s ‘essential’ or you are exercising, or working or need to get food. But what you and I and Anastasia (Palaszczuk) and the rest of Australia deem essential differs a ton…

Most of us want and need you to be good leaders but also be a little more specific in your leadership. 


I mean if I go out to grab a takeaway coffee is it deemed ‘essential?’ I don’t think so, but at the same time, we are constantly being encouraged (by yourselves) to support small local business. Some of them only get by with the number of coffees they sell!

What about the hairstylists?

Is it still legal to get a haircut ‘n’ colour? They haven’t legally been told to close down (as far as I am aware). But seriously, are they essential and how do you maintain social distancing (and stay 1.5m away from anyone not living in your house) trying to cut/colour hair, but at the same time support their business. We ladies have had years of building a rapport with our hairstylists and want to support them on one hand but don’t want to put ourselves at risk on the other. 

Get on the same page, be consistent and speak plainly and truthfully, we can take it!

You ‘Powers-that-be’ have got to be on the same page, otherwise some of us ‘dumb folk’ just don’t get it. Stop changing the position of the ‘goalposts’ on a day to day basis and just give us a definitive ‘yes’ or ‘no’. I mean, will I be getting my hair coloured at the salon or will I risk a DIY dye-job likely to turn my head orange like ‘Rusty the clown’ for the next 6 months? I promise I will abide by whatever you say but we just need clear-cut clarification on these subjects.

Follow the rules in your State

You say in any case, follow the basic rules in your state, but we are continually confused by the media because Qld airs the NSW news on morning shows, so you have to figure out what is relevant to your State as the rules change day to day, if not hour to hour. But don’t break the rules peeps or you will be fined, like A lot… Seriously!

I don’t know about you, but I am becoming increasingly confused as to what my States rules are. The information out there is so ironically contradictory.

Here’s what I can decipher:

Note, this is my ‘tongue in cheek’ look at some of the info given for avoiding catching the coronavirus. I realise this is a very serious issue, but some of the info put out there by ‘people-in-power’ and then passed on by the media is not only paradoxical but is downright senseless. Is it just the way the media edit, is it taken out of context???

Whatever… it’s getting more confusing by the day.

The Groundrules:

  • Do not go outside, stay inside but… go outside to get ‘essential’ exercise and some ‘essential’ Vitamin D.
  • Only exercise in groups of two unless you are a family cohabiting or a group of friends living together or you’re with a dog but… don’t go driving together if you’re a Learner driver and her Mum or you will be fined in Queensland and Victoria… even if you live together… It’s OK if you’re driving to the shops tho.
  •  “Every Australian has a part to play in slowing the spread of coronavirus…” It is perfectly safe for all Queenslanders to come together in groups to vote, you will be fined if you do not vote as it is compulsory. Just stand 1.5m away from each other… but use the same pencils in the same stalls, then go home and wash your hands… In all other situations, it’s illegal to gather in groups and you will be fined.
  • If teachers get too many kids at school, they may have to close but… they won’t be closing.
  • Children and younger people don’t usually get the virus, and rarely get very sick but… they can be carriers and children and young people are not immune and some have in fact died.
  • Support your local small business but… do it while not going outside, only if it’s essential.
  • Don’t wear masks, masks can cause you to touch your face which puts you more at risk for the virus but… it’s ok if you come from a different cultural background to wear them.
  • Masks aren’t necessary for the local community, only for virus carriers. 
  • You may not know who a virus carrier is. The virus may very well cause only mild symptoms in most people or it could cause fatality. 
  • Do wear a mask if you have one, particularly if you make one at home, a bandanna will do but again, they are not deemed necessary. 
  • Call your GP if you have any of the symptoms, they will not see you until you have isolated for 2 weeks but… get them to test you anyway.
  • Wash your hands frequently and thoroughly with soap or use hand sanitiser but… don’t overuse the soap/sanitiser or you may cause an allergy, dermatitis or toxicity.
  • Don’t hoard all the toilet paper, pasta or canned foods, in fact, there are restrictions on many of these items but… do stock up so you don’t have to go to the supermarket every day as this may be the most likely place of community transmission.
  • You don’t need gloves either because you should be perfectly safe as everyone is practising good hygiene in Queensland.
  • Queenslanders are doing an excellent job, better than the other States because we all follow the rules better.
  • Beaches are closed so don’t bother going unless you are a local surf dude… then it’s OK. 
  • Stay in your suburb people but… go out of it for exercise or if something is ‘essential’… then it’s OK.
  • Hospitals are not places you want to be at the moment… If you are sick avoid hospitals and stay home… Hospitals can make you sicker unless you are really, really sick yourself.
  • If you have any symptoms, get tested… but not if it’s only a slight cold… But if you are an essential worker, get tested.
  • Get a flu shot, this year it is more important than ever. The Pharmacies have run out of flu shots but… get one anyway.
  • Don’t go near any Nursing/Retirement homes but… reach out and don’t forget to bring the elderly their medication, food and essentials.
  • Skype, Zoom or FaceTime the elderly regularly because they understand all of that technology.
  • You will not get the virus from an animal but… we think it may have started with an animal.
  • Anyone with mental health issues may be exempt, so go to Bunnings to get some plants to plant or maybe go get a puzzle to keep your mind active but… only go if it’s essential…
  • Everything is not ‘essential’ unless it is…, so stay in your suburb….or don’t!

Good Luck Peeps and Stay Safe!